Wednesday, July 31, 2013


Every month I think the same thing. But I really can't believe that it has been 6 months since my little booger has been born! He gets more and more handsome each month that passes by. This month has been epic - eating sold foods and learning to sit up unassisted top the milestone chart. I feel like his motor skills are really good. His hand motions seem quite developed and he's nearly got the pincer grasp now. He rolls over from belly to back very consistently now. Back to belly not so much, but he has done it once or twice and will do it if you roll him to his side first. He's started paying great attention to small details like buttons on shirts or rings on fingers. He screams, growls, and babbles with lots of "ah" sounds - mama, baba, nana. Still holding out for dada.

Laying in bed last night, I closed my eyes and tried to imagine what it used to feel like to lay in bed. Feeling little taps in my belly that turned into bigger taps that turned into punches and violent rolls. I tried to remember the enormous difficulty it took to roll from one side to the other. How desperately I wanted to sleep on my back. How soothing it felt to rub my belly and know that I wasn't alone. It was really hard to remember how it felt. It was even harder to remember a time before that, when Colton was still a little blueberry sized embryo, when he was barely a poppy seed, before I even knew he existed, while he was still just a dream for the future. It was nearly impossible to close my eyes and go back to that time. Life before him feels like ages ago.

Each night now I listen to his soft breathing turned to loud snoring turned to silence and back again while he sleeps next to me in his Rock and Play, the only bed he's ever known. We are going to have a heck of a time when we FINALLY move him to his crib. It will happen someday soon. Part of me is ready. Part of me doesn't want him to leave my side.

When his breathing tapers off to silence I know he's entering another deep sleep cycle and I breathe a sigh of relief. I try to allow myself to drift off, and to put out of my mind that he might be awake in an hour, or two hours, or five hours, there's no method to his madness. 

Monday, July 29, 2013


Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Since Google Reader and the apps that used it no longer work (sad face) I started using bloglovin today. And I guess I'm supposed to claim my blog? So...that's it. If you are looking for a replacement for Google Reader, give it a try!

Background & a Blogging Vow

I used to find such a great joy in blogging. In writing, actually. I began writing stories as a kid before I even knew how to read. My mom would write down stories for me as I told them aloud. I even have "stories" that I wrote myself that just look like a bunch of scribbles.

Every summer during elementary school, I had a gigantic notebook filled with half-written stories about best friends or school or summer vacation. When we got a computer when I was in 4th grade I poured my creative mind into stories of a group of young girl characters I created that attended a boarding school together. I can't picture now how many unfinished stories about them that I had, only that I was so upset when that old computer finally died and all of my work disappeared.

On to junior high, where livejournal became my platform for writing about life rather than fiction. I had two livejournals in junior high and high school, one that I could link publicly in my AIM profile, and one that was private for my eyes only. I wrote quite a bit in my myspace as well, and could kick myself for deleting it. I had so many pictures and videos and blurbs that I wrote that were not saved anywhere else.

Writing in high school was fulfilled in my English background, taking writing classes as electives, and writing on the newspaper staff and yearbook. I was convinced that my future was all about writing, my passion, what I had loved since I was a toddler. I declared a journalism major as I headed off to college.

Somewhere along the way, other passions emerged. The helping professions stood out to me most of all. I switched colleges, switched majors, and life became very different as I moved out and got engaged. That is when I started this little blog. I wanted to write about life at the time, as a newly engaged college student and everything that went along with it.

Between lulls in the action and life becoming busier, blogging came and went. My love for writing as always prevailed, though. These days the most I write is a sleep log for Colton or a research paper. I would love to be able to look back on this blog and remember events in more detail than my memory allows.

I vow to continue sharing my story - blogging about anything, everything, or nothing at all.